10 11 12

Autumn winds blows again. Leaves rustle outside my window. Streets are quiet with activity. Sounds of a witch is screaming tells me Holiday season is now. Theme song of the horror classic Halloween is played every twenty seconds. It is supposed to scare and intimidate, but I find it calming. Soon trick or treaters will be racing through the streets to grab their loot of chocolate and caramel gifts. After that will come Thanksgiving, then Christmas, and then the New Year.

It cool outside. Temperature has dropped
a good 20 degrees compared to a couple of weeks ago. No more swimming in the pool. No More fans pushing stale air around. No more afternoon shower to make the day bearable. Next few weeks it will be sweater weather with nice outside fire. Smores and nights looking up in the stars. Looking for Ursa Major, Ursa Minor. Checking out the meteor shower on the brisk night sky.

Would make a wish on the streaking green lights. Boulder-sized asteroids skipping on the atmosphere until it is nothing more than a pebble. Glow so bright then gone. It is calming. Looking at the sky. One gets a feel the largeness of their personhood and smallness of their being. When I look back and imagine what were the skywatchers thinking.Lets call this section of stars Ursa Major because it looks like a Big Bear.Lets call this one Perseid after the sister. We got Cancer, Capricorn, and Sagittarius.

Watched an old twilight zone episode, they pondered the question. What if the dark skies and bright stars weren't those dark matter and gases of helium and hydrogen?  What if the darkness was a massive black box with holes punched in?

I'm reminded by a line in a movie with Jodie Foster and David Morse. There was an exchange between Father and younger daughter. She asks if there is life on on other planets, Her father responds, "I don't know, Sparks. But I guess I'd say if it is just us... seems like an awful waste of space."

Last few years, my mortality has been an issue. Before, I was never a religious person, hardly ever attending Church. But since then I have solidified my Faith and become more at peace. Looking at my Iphone app. Its a 24 Hour timer. It counts backward the seconds minutes left in the day. Now it is 23:55:45. Twenty three hours, fifty minutes and forty five seconds before this ends. 

When I look at the mistakes. . .and achievements. . .I have made so far. It gives me pause. Have I used my time wisely? Have I fulfilled my purpose? Is there a Purpose? I believe so. Not sure I can quantify what that is, Is is money? Is social connections? Is it pieces of art or scientific accomplishment?  

There is something. A connection we make with one another. One economist describe an invisible hand guiding the direction of society. We are individual neuron that causes a society to react. Some are stronger than others. They have a greater impact. One cannot dismiss one sole cell and say it is insignificant. Each one has the potential to create such beautiful dreams and such horrible nightmares.At times we feel so lost, then we realize we are not. 

Looking at the gift I received in an email today, I am reminded that I am not lost. I am not alone. I am reminded that decisions I make and may help another not feel so cut off. I am reminded that we ask the Universe she will give us what we need. Our purposes is guided by something larger than what I can perceive. I am given opportunities and lessons. I am meet People to Love and People that Love Us Back. They will, through their mistakes and achievements, will give me what I need teach me lessons I need to learn. Time is 23:17:33