I've been trapped by a Root Beer Float

A quite hum of the vending machines keeps me calm. Sitting here in the darkened room waiting for the time to go by. Wondering where I should go now. So much to see so much to do. Ready myself for tomorrow’s adventure or should I lose myself in another’s story. The pool is calling. Ready for me to keep her company. Been with her much these last few days. 50 here and 50 there. Makes me wonder why I don’t visit her more. Recumbent is calling, too. Friend requests on Nikeplus also beckons. Been too long since I won an event. Getting that Jpeg trophy is something I have not seen for some time. 24 hours is also calling. Yesterday, I was with her. My chest is still sore this morning. Four sets of Hammer Strength incline, decline, cable pulley, lat pull downs. Maybe I should go to Regional and see if I have any late fees for overdues. Cinemark has its latest editions, but none seem to interesting.

Or I can do what I am doing now. Putting thought to electrons hoping this stream of consciousness will manifest into something wonderful.

The cafeteria workers talk of the Alfalfa Fair tonight. ZZ Top, Weird Al Yankovich, Ted Nugent, and the Beach Boys are playing. Never saw a bull riding contest. This sounds interesting. Yet, on the Showcase it talks about the standing attraction around Southern California interests me, too. I’d like to see where Darla and Alfala from the Little Rascals are buried. I’d like to see Cydney Robinson performing at the . . .something.  Also, liked to Venture to Ventura and Santa Barbara to see the California Missions.

So much to do? Yet, I am a statue, motionless. Listening to cafeteria ready itself for the dinner rounds. This place of indecision is the fork in the road for my life for tomorrow. Could always turn this way and that. Not sure where the Big Smile will need me. Moments are readying itself for something Grand, something special. Have you ever wondered what life would be like if you chose a different path, gone a different directions, made other choices? Don’t think about too much, but this pause gives me time to reflect on where tomorrow will have me.

Think of those times, having a sit down with that nice coffee. Wondering if you should approach that nice girl with the pretty smile. You wonder if you should ask the stranger what he thinks of the book he is reading. You wonder if you should go it alone or with others. All these every day decisions make the life we choose. Wondering .  . .Just wondering.

Looks my decisions has been made. I am trapped. Held hostage by a root beer float brigade. Sitting at the back table of the cafeteria and I am stuck. For some reason, they decided to have their ice cream celebration right in front of me. Two giant buckets of Vanilla ice cream and 10 bottles of AW. They parked their carts in front of me and the line is forming quickly behind them. These cowboy hatted ladies have held me hostage. 

Can’t move so here I sit waiting for all the units at the hospital get served root beer floats. ICU, CCU, ER, OR, Cafeteria, Pharmacy, IT, Pathology, Medical Records,  Lab, Volunteers, Nursing Admin, and so much more.

Its funny how when we ask the universe for help, she gives us what we need. It is truly to ridiculous to believe to think we really have control of anything. In a second, typing a way wondering what the next course of action would than all of sudden you are trapped by cowboy inspired crew hell bent in making people smile with their calorie-heavy root beer concoctions.  Could be worse like a car accident or a diagnosis of CHF. C’est la vie.

Well, I misspoke. What we have control is how we decide to look at our situation. In other words, our attitudes. Writing this blog has been a challenge. Haven’t written everyday as I would have liked. Haven’t done many things I had goal-ed for. However, its been fun nonetheless.

Looking back at the sights I’ve seen makes me realize that there are miracles everywhere.  In every moment, in every place, in every everything. This year, I’ve taken to my digital camera and find myself amazed how things change. I am amazed how many things remain the same. Its hard at times falling in and out of habits of importance. We need to be reminded to take a moment. Take that picture. To be where you are. 

Right now, a root beer float has been handed to me so I must enjoy. If I  don't enjoy it now I would have missed my chance to take that bite out of my quickly melting float. Pool and gym to follow.

Discovery

Cardiologist appointment in an hour. Don’t think it will be as positive as before. Been off the wagon for a few months. Perhaps this why I’ve been out of sync. Been in habits not conducive to a lifestyle of more life. Won’t dismiss all the traveling and adventures have not been fun, but I know there were many times that I could have done something differently. 

I am sure this is true in many of our lives. Things could have been a lot different if one said or did something differently. Saw a picture of my ex-girlfriend with her new baby girl (I think girl). Looked at her profile picture and it  reminded in how in a few short years many things could have been a lot different. Sent a friend request to a lady that is my good high school friend’s ex-wife. She is married now and looks happy from her photos. Spent time in his and her house one weekend reminiscing. Still don’t know where my friend, her ex is. 

From what I hear, my friend (her ex-) got shacked up with someone and now is pursuing a career in acting. Another friend is up north and has not returned any emails. Its funny how time flies by so and one see the road not traveled.  

Circle of friends are smaller these days. Some by choice. Some by attrition. Had lunch at a restaurant with some nice people and it reminded me the camaraderie factor. It reminded me how important a nod and smile can make a world of difference.

At dinner, one said she would venture out more, but she does not know where to go. Thought to myself that unknown is what drives us to go and adventure. It is this not knowing that is the fun part. At times it is discovering that wonderful new restaurant by the beach. Sometimes, it is learning that a new way of doing the same old thing, like grilled PBJs. Sometimes you learn that you like taking photos of flowers because you got a psychic message to. Often times, this discovery is learning, discovering about loved ones and yourself.

It is good to reminisce. Yet Future is the destination. Looking forward, there is so much to see. So much to enjoy. So much to live. The river we have ventured has gotten us to this place where we need to be. Could wax on about time immemorial passed; however, around the corner, around the next bend, is somewhere one belongs. Where one is committed to. Where that is for me, I am yet to find out. However, the journey will uncover many gifts of the world and many new gifts about me I’ve yet to discover. The price for these treasures are my time and choices. My chakras will clear. I will get attuned. The people that were once good friends will return or they will stay in the past where they should be. I send my love to them nonetheless. And I will move on because around the corner is where I will meet my new/ old friend again.

Congratulations Shell on your beautiful baby. Hope to see you again Scott. Brian you are missed, but its time.