Three Hours Twenty Nine Minutes and Forty One Seconds

Three hours twenty minutes and some change. This is all that is left for this day.

When was that moment when you whole life changed?

Can’t really say anything comes to mind. At this moment, it has been a slow steady series of choices one makes. Been having some time losing weight. Not an uncommon adventure, I gather. Think I lost around thirty pounds these last couple years. Not exactly, barn burning but its been a change. Once lost twenty pounds in four days, then for the rest of wrestling season it was a bitch to lose three. That was decades ago.  I wonder if I can get cut again.

Thinking about the choices I made. Some were brewing for some time. Been thinking about giving meat for awhile. Decided to give up meat and chicken for Lent. Year before that gave up bread. Did it, but this year I wanted more of a challenge. Its been a struggle but its been doable. Choosing salmon and tuna over a burger and fries. Eating more salads and going the bean and cheese burrito routes. Going to Red Lobster versus BJs and Lucilles. Forgoing Original Tommys and Inn N Out for a BK Fish Sandwich. Tofu in Black Bean Sauce and Shrimp Fried Rice from Nopgow.  Sausage and Bacon Pizzas have been substituted for sardines and mushrooms. Sardines too salty. Eggs benedict minus the ham versus Prime Rib Special at Krazy Ottos.

Another choice has been checking at the gym. Been to the gym everyday this year. Today will make it 297 days straight. At times I just went in and checked in. At times, got in at least 20 minutes on the stationary.  There were times when it was something just to go in. Made it part of the lifestyle. Not as gung ho as before, No more two to three hour stints. But still I show up. An old adage keeps coming to mind. Half of the people show up. Half of these people show up on time. Half of these people come prepared with the work done. Half of those people are ahead of the game.

Decide some time ago, there are other things. Getting good grades and being first in everything stopped being in a priority a long time ago. Seeing Rochelle getting sick made me realize, time is too short to deal with what other people want and expect. Letting basketball go. Stop caring about patches for wrestling. Stop swimming because if I wasn’t going to be the best, than there were too many things left to do before kicking the bucket.

Choices like these are ones that do not come with a price. We get these messages. Some come in the form of dream. Some come in the form of a coincidences. We each make these choices and before too long we are far from the place we thought we might be. Long time ago, I was VP of College Republican.  Now, I am decline to state.  Used to watch the Clinton trials on CNN and now I don’t know if I will be voting for Romney.

Two hours and forty minutes left of this day.

Long view of things, I know there is more. People we meet I have feeling we met before and  will meet again. If not in this lifetime, than the next. We meet. We Fall In Love. We say Goodbye. We will continue struggling with the same old issues until we decide to do something different. Learned thing in Counseling Psych. Multi Generational process. Won’t get into it, but we learn how to do things from the ones that raised us. We continue the same pattern because this what we know and what is comfortable.

We become like the one before us.

That is until we decide to do something different. We learn the Lessons that We need to learn than we go on to the next one.  For some the process can be immediate and spontaneous. For others, it is long and measured process with several falls from grace. Still once the choice of do something else happens, it will certainly build momentum and critical mass is achieved. All these thoughts, behaviors, and attitudes become altered until we are no longer the same person we once were.

Don’t think these changes are not unplanned. I believe there is a plan, a design. Like a course of river, there are forces out there guide sculpt history. Individual history, group history, world history.

Always loved the Twilight Zone episode with Russell Johnson (May remember him. He was the Professor from Gilligan’s Island) Episode was called “Back There” Twilight Zone "Back There" episode Google the storyline to get the gist. Anyways, certain events cannot be changed dramatically. Certain things are directed and guided by the Fates, i.e.,  who we meet, when we meet, and when it’s over.  Some events are preordained.

Still we have Choices and Free Will. Like a butterfly choosing to flap its wings, these minute choices can make a world of differences.  Choosing to make a change.  Change of past behavior. Change in thinking and attitude. Change in behavior and beliefs. Change to become something different, some thing more. We choose to show up, choose to be there even late. Choose to become prepared. Choose to be ready for tomorrow.

Why? Because there is only this amount time left.