Scribbles before Fight

This will be a short post. Once my laptop reaches a 100% charge, I am Audi.

Sitting at the bridge between the two towers here at the Central Library earlier in the day.  Been wanting to come here for ages, finally did after going to Saturday mass. Needed to get some G Time. Haven’t done that for awhile. Think I will be coming more regular, may 2 or 3 times for morning mass. I think my soul can handle it. Actually, I backed off for a bit. Needed to get some space and time. Did my reading, and I gots me some understanding.

My mind wanders when sitting in church. A week back in Sunday Mass, and they had the statue of the Fatima. Mom came with me. When she saw the Fatima, she immediately got up and touched the statue’s feet.  She never did that before. The Fatima was on a visit from somewhere. I was a bit surprised. I lacked understanding.

Been researching the Fatima. Some stuff what I gathered.  This got me revved up again. Started visiting various other holy places from different religious practices. Wanted to go to the source for this Higher Power. Stopped by the LA synagogue. Went to a Buddhist temple. Spoke with an Iman. Stopped by the St Andrews Abbey. Also, visited San Fernando Mission again.

This Saturday mass, I started thinking of Manny Pacquiao Fight and Chess.  Used to play chess, a lot. The Bishop, the knight, the queen, king and so on. Why do people choose the roles they take? What possess one to do what they do? Is it evolution? Is it behavioral? Is it some unresolved stuff from a previous life? What is it?

Take for instance the Dalai Lama. He’s been reportedly  reincarnated a fourteen times. His presence has inspired many movies, Seven Years in Tibet, Kundun and so on. He’s a rock star. Supposedly, in some schools of Hinduism it says that we have 8 stages of life in Hinduism. 2 stages belong to the life before. 4 stages are your own. Last two stages are set ups for the life coming. Karmic law and Dharma and the rest.

General Patton believed in reincarnation, too. He felt he fought in the Italy before as a Roman. I mean, he was a hero to the People.  Like George Washington and Bruce Lee. Like Manny Pacquiao. What makes a person a hero?

Tonight, for example, Manny Pacquiao will be fighting Margarito tonight in Dallas, Texas. A classic hero, coming from the barrios of the Philippines, and makes good. Margarito, a fallen fighter, who is looking for redemption. Maybe, it is how 24/7 HBO depicts these characters. But all this is Joseph Conrad myth-making stuff.

Freddie Roach, Manny’s trainer, said this may well be Manny’s last fight. Win or lose. WIN, OF COURSE. But certain people have been gifted. A Midas Touch about it them. From Poverty to Power in a short lifetime. What makes a person overcome Herculean Labors? What brings them to the top of the Mountain? This is so Rocky-ish. Is it some divine intervention? Is it pure will? Is it Darwinian’s “Most Fit” at play?  Our history is filled with these rags to riches. Secreteriat, Abraham Lincoln, Jackie Robinson, and so on. Overcoming obstacles are what heroes do. What separates the good from the great? What is the Gravitas? We all know it when we see it.

Back to church, I was thinking. A pawn is supposedly the weakest piece on the board. Can be taken out by a slew of other pieces. Rook, Bishops, Knights and Queens. However, once the pawn reaches its eight rank, then it can be transformed to a stronger piece. Sure many fall the waist side. They are cannon fodder.  Eight opportunities to reach the 8^th rank, then possibilities are endless.

Think about it. Some say being King is good. It is the piece that matters. Games ends and finishes with the King. It can go any which way. Up, down, left, right, diagonal. However, it is not afforded the range of maneuverability as his Queen. Plus, everyone and their mother are coming after you.  That is the whole basis of the game, Capture the King.

Being a queen is no picnic, either. Sure, it has the power of the Rook and bishop combined. But there is only one of her, compared the others. Plus, Queen is also on many people’s wish list. Furthermore, these lowly pawns at the end of the game, all want to be like her eventually. It’s a reverse sword party. No, perhaps, it more a it’s a Lilith Fair. By game’s end. I mean why would anyone want to be king. The queen has the most power on the board.

Still, I digress. Whether you are a King,  queen, Bishop, Knight . We all have some role we play in life. We are Mother, Father, Daughter, Son, Brother Sister, and so on. Actually, we die and are reborn. We go through rites of passage where we put childlike things away to become something more. To take our place in the community again. We become many things by necessity. It is built in. Hardwired in the DNA. Conditioned by Society with an ever changing system of reward and punishment.

We pursue many things. Evolving and devolving in order grasp these trinkets and ideals from the nethersphere.  Each role brings benefits and drawbacks. Like salmon, there is a drive, an instinct, a wish to reach the top of the mountain. Going upstream, battling each other, battling predators to survive. All in order to seed the next generation with our hopes, dreams, and DNA.

Things is. This is all okay. It has purpose. May not be the things one likes. We may delude ourselves with beliefs of grandiosity. Some things are true whether we believe it or not. Still, it is what we got. All this is the life stuff. This is the fun part. We fall in love. We fall out of it. We have our hearts filled with Joy and Love. We get our Hearts broken with no foreseeable reason.  We recover, then discover, “Let’s Do It Again.” We fight. We win. We fight. We lose. We do what we do because this is the thing we call, “Life.”  We need to be inspired. This is the Hero’s role. We need to be filled with something greater. We search for this “Feel Good.” We seek to be re-energized. To transform. To be Queened. 

Okay. Time is up. Sorry, this was longer than anticipated. Got in the Flow. My laptop is charged and it is time to watch another hero battle.  In life, we are all pawns. We are also Kings and Queens, too. And everything In Between. Okay, “Let’s Get ready to RRRUUUMMMMBBBLLLEEE!!! “ Go Manny Pacquiao.

Anahata: Zuma Recharged

Chakras 

Sitting, watching the waves crash. Having the water rush to where I sit. Drinking the colors of the rainbow. Spinning the chakras. Breathing red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. My base, sacral, solar plexus, heart, throat, brow, and crown. Lam, Yam, Ham, Ram, Ohm. Breathing the energy in to let the spinning. Taking the ocean of ions recharging the spiritual batteries. 

Clarity

Never been a great follower of the energy healing, however, why not.  I must admit sitting there, there were moments when the sounds of the ocean waves got clearer. Perhaps my sinuses were clearing. Maybe just sitting there and taking in just made thing more salient.

Upside down happy face by Angelo

My Needs

Breathing better now. Slept like a baby after the day at Pointe Dume. Don’t want to say it was the force, my prana, Big Smiles touch, or whatever divine intervention that brought some clarity. Hanging with family at the beach was. . . therapeutic. Honestly, needed to be there yesterday. Needed to watch the sun race across the sky, shine its light on me.  Needed to taste to the white waves crash. Needed to bathe in the smile of my family’s face.  Needed to hear the laughter of kids on boogie boards catch a good one. Needed to dance with the seaweed mountains as they swayed in and out the wet sands. Needed to feel safe as the lifeguards patrolled this space of heaven, while they twirled their red buoys in BayWatch fashion. 

This lifeguard saved two people today

Diaphragmatic

Taking a deliberate breath. Four seconds in, two seconds hold, and four second out. As I sat there I was reminded that transitory nature of everything. It was watching the kids dig holes on the beach, digging desperately to try keep the ocean out. Smiling on how this was incredibly futile. Their joy, their laughter, their cries, as they held on to what can’t be held. Yet, they dug anyways. I was reminded it was not that the holes was dug, it was not whether succeeded in stemming the tide. It was the act and their responses to endless ocean. Instinctively, I knew they knew. Yet, they smiled and sighed anyways. I forgot this was the fun stuff. Their joys reminded me of this fact.

What Is Really Important

Watching them dig deep for sand crabs. Pulling out little creatures as they tickled their hand trying to bury themselves in the beach, not knowing the crabs are in the hands of babes. It was watching Dorian laugh glee as the sand crabs disappear into the sand. It was the Flow

V

Entertainment was watching the overcast on the beach. Being amazed as the endless oceans crash. Seeing the flying “V” of the  pelicans. Looking at the water beyond the crashing waves, hoping to see a family of dolphins. 

Pelicans

For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge 

Lying on the unicorn blanket listening to college kids using the word, “Fuck” as an adjective, verb, pronoun, adverb, and an interjection. It was hearing their conversation transition from well-reasoned debate on China’s single child policy, to choice between death by polar bear, gobi desert, and mount everest.  It was listening to the gasping incredulity of the group as one of the group admits her inability to swim. It was the realization that I heard their parent’s guilt trip in these cynical kids. It was the listening to the necessity of IPads, desktops, and need for a shower.

Seaweed, Sand, and Sun

Joy was watching the family packed beach with makeshift forts made of umbrellas and boogie boards. It was the tanning femmes. The sight of footballs flying overhead amongst the kites and helicopters overhead. It was watching the bi-plane overhead telling all to Find their Captain and drink some innocuous drink.

ticket attendant. It was worth every penny

Something  about Point Dume. Something about Zuma.

Heliotherapy, Zuma-Style

Sunday at the beach recharged my batteries. It reminds me to take a moment of pause. It reminds me of the noise that one hears from all around. It reminds me that all these moments is the fun stuff is. It is wonderment of sand crab crawling on one’s hand for the first time. It was learning of a lifeguard saving a grandfather and grandson. It is watching a 3 year old sleep under a towel forever because he played  hard on the Dume. It is hearing the noise of college kids daily challenges. It is sitting watching  the summer sun chase after its lover to the west, to some place  special. It is not so much saving the world for me anymore. It is more staying in the right now. It is that one moment in time and being in the past, present, and future at the same time.

Sitting there she said this at least a 10 times. Must heard what I was feeling

"I Love the Beach"

It’s a gift.