Nike+ Challenge--My Origin
Today's battle. A Cyber Bully. Let's call him Kanye. Why? He is a sore loser.(Refer to Taylor Swift/ Kanye West VMA Awards)
Joined Nike Plus. Its a website for runners with Nike+ sensors. On this site, runners post challenges, chart runs, set goals, request traing assistance, etc. Started a couple months ago. Purchased the sensor a year ago, but never used it. In late July, I found it and started using it. Needed something to get my fat ass to the gym. It monitored my progress. This was great, at first. Guess, I needed more. Looking back, I was afraid of the sensor, afraid of running. Never been a great runner. Actually, crappy would best describe me. Geriatric is another good adjective.
Joined a couple of distance challenges. Object was not who's the fastest. Nor is it who does the most mileage in a month. Its just Finishing. This is what I needed. You see, I have congestive heart failure (another post for another time). Needed something to keep me moving. Or I would die fat and short of breath. Swimming is awesome, but the water gets cold. Plus, riding the stationary bike hurts my butt after an hour.
Forrest Gump, I'm Not
So I got on the treadmill and as Forrest Gump would say "I Started Running!!!" Unfortunately, that stopped quickly. Mind willing, Body not so much. Hurt my ACL playing basketball and my meniscus swells to the point I can't bend my knee. You see as a child, I pushed the school bus uphill in the snow while the rest of the kids drank warm cocoa. Let me tell you, "I'm no Runner." Five foot four weighing 275 lbs at the time, 2 foot stride length. Basically, I was carrying another person around my waist while I run. I wrestled 121s in high school. Depressing. Yet, kept walking. 20 minute miles. If you are runner, you know this is slow. Turtles move faster than I do. Snails, too. Senior citizens in walkers, its a race. (Amendment: with one leg) I was okay with this. I was moving.
JPeg Trophies and Medals Are My Candy
Anyways, I digress. Started getting stronger. Lost 15 lbs. Joined more challenges. Took second in a few of them. This started revving my competitive engine. I like to win. Jpeg trophies are my candy. I was hooked. First month, did 8 miles. Second month, August, 74 miles. Last September, finished 200 miles. Now, shooting for 300 in October. Got a few invite to other challenges. Got a number of friend requests. Started seeing my name in first place on a few challenges. One Nike+ Ambassador asked me to post one of my quips I wrote on her Facebook page on her running blog site. She thought it was inspirational. Now, I felt good. Felt connected. Felt proud. Jpeg trophies and medals brought a smile on my face. Kudos and hollas from Facebook friends pumped me up. Invites for new faster and longer challenges awaited.
Kanye West Called Me A JOINER
Now, I'm in a new fight, a new battle. I am faced with a new challenge. Kanye called me a "Joiner." ARRGHHH!!! You see I'm in a Nike+ Distance challenge with 8 people. 2 on my side. 6 on the other. We are beating the other team by a 100+ miles. Its a rout. One of the challengers I have named Kanye West, a coward, questioned whether I was a "Fan" or "Joiner." A Joiner is a "Tourist" for those Fight Club fan. (Watch the movie, if you don't know.) Expected some smack talk. I expect being called out. Its just the way of the jungle. I responded in kind, not wanting to be a Punk. I questioned Kanye's "Joiner" machismo and he responded. Called me sensitive. Ouch.
"Ali, boma ye!"
I hear the Zairians crowd chant "Ali, boma ye!" "Ali, boma ye!" "Ali, boma ye!" ("Ali, kill him!") You are about to wake the sleeping lion. My 2-person team is beating the 6-person team by a 100+ miles. Personally, if either Shellie or I withdrew, I suspect we'd still win. It still would be 140 miles us to 180 miles them. I suspect that I would be able to catch the other team and perhaps win given the 60 days left. However, other runners could always join or withdraw at anytime. Being called sensitive is getting personal.
Sun Tzu Lectures Me
If your opponent is temperamental, seek to irritate him. Draw the other army out. Frustrate and anger the opponent. This personal effrontery from a dweeb one hundred miles behind bothered me. In the 300, King Leonidas said King Xerxes's weakness is Pride. I have always been prideful and I know that the best recourse may be to let the pettinesss pass. Should I let the name calling wash over me and just play my game. However, now I want to win by a few touchdown. No. Coach Yoast is shouting in my ear, "Leave No Doubt." Maximus orders "Unleash Hell."
I am going to sleep over this and plan my next course of action. Any suggestions, please send them.
The Real Battle, The Real Challenge
Challenge is a good thing. Name calling drives me to do more. It makes me want to head to the gym now. Get on the treadmill. Put up some ridiculous, demoralizing-to-the-other team number. I want beat the entire team by myself. Like Kobe putting up 81 points against the Toronto Raptor. I just want take over the 4th quarter. All this extra running will help my heart and help shed the tire around my waist. These Nike challenges raises my competitive juices. And I want to drink from the cup of victory. Nike, the goddess of victory, calls. "Citus, Altius, Fortius" stands for faster, higher, stronger. That which does not kill us makes us stronger--Friedrich Nietzsche. This personal battle is not with Kanye. I must look at the real opponent. Crimson Tide Denzell Washington, the real opponent is not with the Russians. Its with War Itself. That Opponent being Me. Its my Pride. Its my belly. Kanye, I am deleting you again. The rent in my head just got raised and its eviction time. Just win, baby.
Gotta go now, treadmill is calling. I want to win this challenge running away. Kanye West, I will break you. I will cancel this tour, too.
