Three hours twenty minutes and some change. This is all that
is left for this day.
When was that moment when you whole life changed?
Can’t really say anything comes to mind. At this moment, it
has been a slow steady series of choices one makes. Been having some time
losing weight. Not an uncommon adventure, I gather. Think I lost around thirty
pounds these last couple years. Not exactly, barn burning but its been a
change. Once lost twenty pounds in four days, then for the rest of wrestling
season it was a bitch to lose three. That was decades ago. I wonder if I can get cut again. 
Thinking about the choices I made. Some were brewing for
some time. Been thinking about giving meat for awhile. Decided to give up meat
and chicken for Lent. Year before that gave up bread. Did it, but this year I
wanted more of a challenge. Its been a struggle but its been doable. Choosing
salmon and tuna over a burger and fries. Eating more salads and going the bean
and cheese burrito routes. Going to Red Lobster versus BJs and Lucilles.
Forgoing Original Tommys and Inn N Out for a BK Fish Sandwich. Tofu in Black
Bean Sauce and Shrimp Fried Rice from Nopgow.
Sausage and Bacon Pizzas have been substituted for sardines and
mushrooms. Sardines too salty. Eggs benedict minus the ham versus Prime Rib
Special at Krazy Ottos.
Another choice has been checking at the gym. Been to the gym
everyday this year. Today will make it 297 days straight. At times I just went in and checked in. At times, got in at
least 20 minutes on the stationary.
There were times when it was something just to go in. Made it part of
the lifestyle. Not as gung ho as before, No more two to three hour stints. But still I show up. An old adage
keeps coming to mind. Half of the people show up. Half of these people show up
on time. Half of these people come prepared with the work done. Half of those
people are ahead of the game. 
Decide some time ago, there are other things. Getting good
grades and being first in everything stopped being in a priority a long time
ago. Seeing Rochelle getting sick made me realize, time is too short to deal
with what other people want and expect. Letting basketball go. Stop caring
about patches for wrestling. Stop swimming because if I wasn’t going to be the
best, than there were too many things left to do before kicking the bucket. 
Choices like these are ones that do not come with a price. We
get these messages. Some come in the form of dream. Some come in the form of a
coincidences. We each make these choices and before too long we are far from
the place we thought we might be. Long time ago, I was VP of College
Republican. Now, I am decline to
state. Used to watch the Clinton trials
on CNN and now I don’t know if I will be voting for Romney. 
Two hours and forty minutes left of this day.
Long view of things, I know there is more. People we meet I
have feeling we met before and will meet again. If not in this lifetime, than the next. We meet. We Fall In Love. We say Goodbye. We
will continue struggling with the same old issues until we decide to do
something different. Learned thing in Counseling Psych. Multi Generational
process. Won’t get into it, but we learn how to do things from the ones that
raised us. We continue the same pattern because this what we know and what is comfortable.
We become like the one before us.
That is until we decide to do something different. We learn the Lessons that We need to learn than we go on to the next one. For some
the process can be immediate and spontaneous. For others, it is long and
measured process with several falls from grace. Still once the choice of do
something else happens, it will certainly build momentum and critical mass is
achieved. All these thoughts, behaviors, and attitudes become altered until we
are no longer the same person we once were. 
Don’t think these changes are not unplanned. I believe there
is a plan, a design. Like a course of river, there are forces out there guide
sculpt history. Individual history, group history, world history. 
Always loved the Twilight Zone episode with Russell Johnson
(May remember him. He was the Professor from Gilligan’s Island) Episode was
called “Back There” Twilight Zone "Back There" episode Google the storyline to get the gist. Anyways, certain
events cannot be changed dramatically. Certain things are directed and guided
by the Fates, i.e., who we meet, when we
meet, and when it’s over. Some events
are preordained. 
Still we have Choices and Free Will. Like a butterfly
choosing to flap its wings, these minute choices can make a world of differences. Choosing to make a change. Change of past behavior. Change in thinking
and attitude. Change in behavior and beliefs. Change to become something
different, some thing more. We choose to show up, choose to be there even late.
Choose to become prepared. Choose to be ready for tomorrow.
Why? Because there is only this amount time left.
