Hospitals: Today's Battlefield, Today's Front Line. Its Where Angels Roam

Every Day, Every Night--The Good Fight Dropped Mom at the hospital again. She goes almost every single day. Every day, life and death. Day in, day out. Taxing to the Body. Taxing to the Soul. Taxing to see so much struggle. A lifetime of healthy living, going to the gym religiously, eating well. Unexpectedly and all of sudden. Person is struck down by a stupid car accident. Or going to the hospital could be the result of a lifetime of bad habits. Smoking 2 packs a day, a diet of fat, greasy food, a regimen of lying on the couch, years in front of the boob tube watching other people live life.

Grew up in a hospital Its a second home. Mom's a nurse. Most of my aunts are LVNs and RNs. Uncle Juhn and Uncle Torney are in database. Uncle Alex works Presybyterian Memorial. Uncle Ruth is Engineering at Kaiser, Panorama. Aunty Dely is in Lab. Aunty Myrna worked in the cafeteria. Aunty Ellen and Aunty Cello are in business services. Uncle Alvin is Respiratory Tech. Cousin Jason and Russel's girl are both in RT school now. Leilani is at USC for Occupational Therapy. Ron Mitchell's in X-ray Tech. (Picture of Ron Mitchell and Rochelle Below) Going to the hospital is like going home. All my family members are there.

As a child, I'd roam around the hospital, running here and there. Road the elevators to the different floors. NICU. Lab. Med Surge. Each time the doors opened it was like changing channels on the TV. Each floor had a different show. ICU/ CCU, slow and somber. People stood around so quiet. NICU--Families crying and smiling. ER--fast and exciting. X-ray has secret doors that hid the cool humming sound. Lab--test tubes and microscopes. Morgue, I see dead people. Ate in the cafeteria since the food was free. Learned how to use the computer in database. The hospital was my second home. Always felt comfortable here.

I Hate Hospitals
That all changed. Rochelle got sick. She had stomach cancer. Hospital was not so fun. Seeing my cousin not getting better. Getting worse. Not so much fun. She was dying and I was . . . crying. Losing a playmate. Seeing her plugged up to the ventilator. Canulas in her nose. Tubes in her wrist. IV bag drip. Hearing the respirator breathe for her. Watching the heart rate monitor flash numbers. Systolic, 100. Diastolic, 60. Respiration, 50. Its like watching the stock market. The Flash of P Wave. QRS Wave. T Wave scroll across the screen. Those are the squiggly lines telling us that her heart's still beating. We're waiting for some sign, something miraculous. Hoping, she would magically be better. Rochelle would pop out of the bed to come play with us. C'mon, Rochelle, lets play. Lets go run around the halls. Go to the cafeteria and get our favorite green jello Aunty Myrna made. Take the elevator rides.

Her funeral has come and gone. But we're in the hospital again. Tatay is sick. Years of smoking caught up. Cancer, again. Lung this time. Here we go again. More tubes. More drugs. More time at the stupid hospital. Tatay passed, too. He's buried next to Rochelle. I hate the hospital. Never want to go back.

Got a call. Back to the hospital. Mike, my half-brother. A brother I did not know until a few months ago. The stranger stopped by a few months back. I was angry. I was jealous. I was stupid. Did not know that Dad had another family before us. A truck, 16-wheeler made a wide left. Apparently, the driver did not see Mike while making the turn. Dirt got in his brain. Looking down the Hospital hall. Dad, he's sitting down. Face buried in his hands. His body convulses. My father's sobs echo down the hallway. "Sorry. Sorry. Sorry. Why?" That's all I hear. Another funeral. Another burial. Cemetary, again. More people dressed in black crying. Losing another loved one. Fucking Hospital. I hate this place.

God, Stop. Hospital Bad. I get the point.

Wait, there's more, God answers back. Pushed off a slide. Broke my arm. Damn, hospital. Knelled on glass table. Stitches for my knee. Can't go swimming. Hospital. Got to get shots, hospital. Cousin Edwards on the third floor, appendix removed. Hospital. Dislocated elbow. Patient in next bed keeps talking about yellow spots everywhere. A mere hospital curtain between us. I hear the clanking of the police hand cuffs. Drug overdose. Every one sick and hurt are at the hospital. I don't want to go. So much pain. So much misery. So much. Too much for me. I hate hospitals.

I need a party. Hospital party, well, I guess so. All family friends and co-workers are from the hospital. Their kids I can play with. That's not so bad. Played volleyball. Game winning spike. Gift shop is okay. Doctors and nurses are alright, I guess. Security guards say Hi. Ambulances with the blaring sirens and flashing lights are cool. Hospital green jello is my favorite. I still don't love the hospitals like I used to.

Code. . .Huh?
Time passes. Took mom to the hospital, Again. LCH. Lancaster Community Hospital. 6 in the morning. Pick her up at 7:30 at night. Used to drop her off at 7 at night, then pick her up 7 in the morning. No more graveyard shifts. She's got to watch her Dancing with the Stars. 8 pm it starts. She walks in. Automatic doors open. Says "Bye" to the nurses leaving. Stethoscope around her neck and lunch bag in hand. She walks into the battlefield. She goes into the struggle where life and death happen every single day. As the door open, over the speaker. "Code: Blue. Code: Blue. Code: Blue." It means, everyone get ready.

Code Blue: Heart attack patient coming in. Code Red: Fire. Code Green: Combative person using physical force. Code Brown. defecating person. Code Amber: Child Abduction. Code Pink: Infant Abduction. (Sometimes, its nurse being harassed by doctor. Keep this on the down low, not a very pleasant occurrence) Code Grey: Combative person no weapon. Code Orange: Show of force. Code Yellow: Missing patient. Code Rainbow: Riot.

Angels Roam the Hospital
My mom is one of them. She battles every single day. She works in CCU. Her patients are the terminally ill, post op from heart surgery, Swine flu, isolation. 500 lb morbidly obese that need 6 nurses to roll over. Stabbed inmates. Failed suicide attempts. Car accidents in full body casts. Psych patients that did not take their meds.

Mom guards her patients from the Grim Reaper. She also welcomes and introduces them to Death. Ravages and pains of cancer riddles the young and old. Like Rochelle. Like Tatay. Or accident cases. Like Mike. Like Andreas, my neighbor's son. She has a cordial relationship with Death. There is a Hate/ Not-so-much Hate with Death. Its just the way it is. She goes on with her business. Like every female Filipino, its her calling. Nursing. She liked the white uniform. She wears blue scrubs these days.

Mom gives the patients meds. She checks IV bags and life monitors. Gives her reports. Replaces dressing. She reviews student nurses work. She problems solves. For two shifts, nurses were wondering why there was no stool in plastic bag. Patient report read symptom, diarrhea. Last night, mom scolded the male student nurse. She asked why the tube is not in the patient's anus. Its in the other orifice. She sternly asks if he knows the difference. (She's laughing on the inside) They insert the tube in the correct hole. 700 cc. Jackpot. Its a gusher. NICE. Yuck.

Kaiser, I Hope
I've decided. I will work in the hospital, too. Not because I want to wipe, I don't. As a Pharmacy Tech, I hope. You see, the hospital is my second home. I grew up here. Good memories and bad experiences. And everything in the middle. I'd like to see more angels before I go to heaven. Haven't seen too many Angels lately. Seeing Angels makes me believe in a higher source. Anyways, here she comes. Dancing with the Stars starts in 30 minutes. Tom Delay broke his foot. He's out. Leaving for the hospital. Maya is not bad. Kathy Ireland is stiff. Who is going to get eliminated? Yes, I know the the car is too cold. I will roll up the window, mom. Got to get her home. Her show starts in 15 minutes.