Gladiators: Observation at the Bee (Part 2 of 2)

(Cont from Gladiators-observations-of-bee-part-1-of-2)

French Revolution

When you pan the audience, one sees Non-spelling parents yawn. Parents that are spelling one can see them mouth the words in confidence. They shake their heads as they hear their child spell it wrong.  Then that surprised look as they realize that their children are better spellers than they are.

Each row of kids come up to mic. They sway to the left and right waiting for their turn. Heart is racing as the walk up to the mic. I understand that this how the aristocrats felt at the French revolution as they met the invention of Dr. Joseph-Ignace Guillotin. 

I Love This Guy--He Takes A Fall, But He Gets Back Up

Personally, I am waiting for one to get light-headed under the pressure and take a header.Words from the Mike Meyers movie, "So I Married An Axe Murderer"--"We got a Speller Down. Speller Is Down" I can still see that spelling bee kid on ESPN. If you don’t know, here it is. I love this guy. He takes a fall and gets back up.

Wouldn't You Like To See This?

Maybe someday, we’ll see a speller, a 4^th grader with the ‘Nads’ to spell an impossible word like, “quixotic”. “Can I get a definition? Can I get that used in a sentence? Can you give me the language of origin?  “quixotic, Q-U-I-X, ummmm, I-D-O-N-‘-T-K-N-O-W-T-H-I-S-I-M-P-O-S-S-I-B-L-E-W-O-R-D-B-U-T-I –W-I-L-L-U-S-E-T-H-I-S-T-I-M-E-T-O-M-A-K-E-U-P-A-N-E-W-W-O-R-D, quixotic.”

I keep hearing Maximus words, “Are you not satisfied? Have I not entertained you?”

Life Lesson About Oneself

Oh well. A lesson that one must learn. It is something to know. Do you enjoy the competition? Some people thrive. Some others just survive. Some just decide to throw in the towel. Love them all.

Not All Are Superstores

Children are all different. Some love the heart racing. Some enjoy the thrill of victory. We need heroes to look up. Some just want to be an honorable mention. Just being part of the game, part of the competition. Guess, it is like being on a high school football or basketball team, but not good enough to be a starter.

Michael Jordan did not make the squad. He didn't turn out so bad. It's times like this day that we fail and decide to get back up. If we can remember what is important to us, and decide to do or not do anything about it.

Success is transient. It is also a habit. I applaud that those decide not play. We as a society try to fight and compete. Working long and late hours, being absent to their kids for the almighty buck.  They must choose to work extra hours to keep the roof overhead and food on the table versus being home attending those with needs. Health goes the way of diabetes and obesity. Yet, this is no subscription for quitting. This simply is a prescription to be who we decide to be and subscription to be okay with that.

Worth the Price? That's Personal

Families longing for that feeling of family-ness. Community’s  feeling communal. It is no wonder why children cocoon themselves in WII and the internet. Pay attention to children, Mom and Dad, and, then the child will pay in kind.

Being a latchkey kid, I understand learning to be my own keeper. TV was my babysitter. Library and parks my friends. Video games and comic books were my escape. Don’t get me wrong. I don’t think I would want to have it any other way.

I've failed over. . .and over and over in my life. This is why I succeed
Lucky for me, I had a knack for school and a voracious hunger for learning. Being introspected was my default position. Plus, I had been prideful. When I didn't succeed, it became a mission to conquer this. Not always great trait, but it drove me to prove people wrong. It was this feeling inside these Spelling Bee-ers are facing today.  Some will take the time to learn who they are and where they want to play. I take solace is in a fellow Feb 17'er's commercial. 

Tension in the air is waning. Each parent is secretly and silently wishing that the other children will falter so they can go home sooner. Climbing that ladder of winner-dom. Learning Center is glorified arena for future lessons to learn.

Lessons to Learn: Applaud Them All. Love Them All

We are not even out of the first round. Disappointed parents are waiting to shuttle their children home. Some parents wait and silently hope the other children will have a mental hiccup. Tension fills the silence.

First round is almost over. Straight faced parent gather things. Child didn’t even get past the first round. Anger is inside them. I can see the tight lipped face. I hope they don’t follow the angry coach’s credo.” Why did you do this?” a parent says in an accusatory tone. Ouch. I hope these parents remember that the child got invited to the dance. Many weren’t.

Alas, these children will never forget how to spell his or her missed word.

Under Pressure

Almost two hours in and we are not even out of the second round. Glad I brought the laptop. Tension is unbearable at times. Sorry kids. Pressure crushes graphite and also makes diamonds. We need graphite to write. Diamonds look pretty. Both graphite and diamonds have value. Kids do, too. Show them Love.

Gladiators: Observations of the Bee (Part 1 of 2)

Coliseum--Gladiators line up waiting to battle the unspoken foes. Hours spent honing their skills. They feel the onlookers. Family and friends in the audience. Their competitions’ family and friends are also in the background. Their voices ring out. Tension is in the air. Their voices drop and rise as they walk to center stage.

Lining Up

Their handler up front directs participants right or left. Victors are guided right and Fallen go to the left. Watchers let a collective sigh as these children warriors step up the stand. Periodically, you see parent rise as their children walk up front to their teachers and leaders. Children are panel-ized. They stand in front of the Panel Three. Each judge gives the thumbs up and thumbs down at the tiny gladiator’s performance.

I wonder if the little ones knows that this is a marathon. Some are spent before they even get up there. You can hear it in their voice. Others you can tell they are enjoying this moment. The sound of their voice rings throughout the auditorium.

Tension is in the air. Parents waiting for the kids to come up. The speaker makes announcements of special guests to the event. Little 3^rd, 4^th, and 5^th graders—Gladiators—all of them. Parents with camcorders and cell phone cameras are making mini-movies. The arena is a grade school cafeteria.

All the kids are lined up walking up to the mic. Each saying their name in hurried, gaspy breaths. Tension in the air chokes the child’s voice. Not even the first mile in this marathon. Some will burn out in the flutter. Some will take flight and soar.

Voices

“My name is Jonathon. My name is Noel. My name is. . .” The parade of children stand and speak into the mic. Ready to battle in the Bee. Hope they know that the battle is within themselves. It is the battle of mastering that word. It is not against each other.  It is battle of confidence. A battle of knowledge. A battle of nerves.

“There will be winners and losers. . .” the principal says.

Yikes. Funny, we are marketed that participating is key. Here these kids are given a wake-up call. A tough life lesson of the bell curve. Some are exceptional. Some are special ed. All are of worth. If we can only remember, that at times the strong are not as strong. Sometimes the weak are not as weak. This is why we play the game.

It Is What It Is

Perhaps this Bee—this competition—is a crucible? We can whittle away all the unnecessariness, all the fluff. We can learn who we are and who we chose to be.

Personally, never was the top 1 percent. On the fringe of being honorable mention. Actually, elite. Not super elite, but I had game. Learned at an early age that I liked to compete and train. Preparing myself for the arena. Knew that my skill was not the brightest, strongest, the fastest. Learned my strength was perseverance. Learned how to manage my strengths and weakness.

Like an actor to perform on stage, I enjoyed when my heart raced. My vision gets narrow and wide at the same time. Feeling of winning was addicting.  Enjoyed conquering this wave that is outside and inside of me.

Alas, this stage if for the younger children. Some will stand. Some will falter. Its just the Bell Curve in effect. One may think “Not Everyone is Extraordinary.”

Trouble is everyone is. Everyone is extraordinary. Everyone is unique. Everyone is special. Caveat needs to be said. Not everyone is extraordinary in this task. Not extraordinary skill. Only 0.03 percent of high school kids will be in the NBA.  Not all win the Nobel.

The First speller stands. The announcer gives the word. “C-H-A-M-P-I-O-N-S-H-I-P” first child speaks.  A collective sigh is exhaled. Tension relieved. Claps unconsciously  rise. This despite a very clear directions to hold all applause until after the rounds are completed.

First round is a funny sight. Midway some fall. Some shout and wakes up the entire audience. Ah, tension is relieved.  

“M-A-G-N-E-T-I-Z-E, magnetize” She is directed right. Next speller, M-E-M-O-R-Y, memory. He, too, is directed right.

A la Gauche

Audience is so quiet. So scary. Each parent looks at each other wondering if the child spelled it right

“T-R-A-G-I-C. . .”  the happy parent smiles. “. . .K, tragic.”  Parent’s smile disappears. Child is a First Rounder Goner. Sucks.  Fitting word. It’s I-R-O-N-I-C-A-L. Okay, I go to the left.
gladiators-observation-at-bee-part-1 continued 

Yeah, I Am Not So Smart At Times

Scary Stuff

Learning more and more people are reading my blog. It’s a bit scary. Not that I did not think it would happen. Not that I didn’t want people to read my blog. It is just that it is becoming more and more real. All I see is three followers. However, I get emails here and there. Some I know. Some, I don’t.  More and more people are learning about my life, my thoughts, my every thing. It is scary.  It’s scary to be so exposed. It’s scary learning people-you-know know stuff about you, you did not directly tell them. You learned the stuff they know are because the blogs you posted.  Basically, I am a private person. I don’t mind being alone here and there. I don’t get lonely much. I’m okay with my own company. 

Masks We Wear

It is just that I am learning to be more accepting of the person who I am. Getting to be that “authentic” self as my new group would say. Everyone wears mask. Each one has roles to play. One is worker. One is a son. One is a brother. An uncle.  A mother. A daughter. A sister.  An aunt.  I wear a comfortable mask.

It's Chicken Sh#t Not. . .

This reading group I have newly joined is on a journey of discovery of the “artistic” self. They have been welcoming and warm. Understanding and guiding.  I am just an emotional novice, an artistic cub.  Though my time has been short, I feel lucky. Their journey is through a book called the Vein of Gold. This group is creating a safe place to find oneself authentic/ genuine self. Funny thing, I believe I am authentic. I think it’s chicken sh*t, when one isn’t giving it their all.

In my writing, I’m trying to let this self—this authentic self--come out. I am trying to be without filters. What I say here is what I say in the world. Just be who I am. Putting my thoughts and experiences out there is scary. People that don’t know you have feelings and thoughts about you. People-that-know-you know more about you that you thought they knew is scary. Confusing? Sorry. Its still scary.

Call, Fold, Or Raise--I Got Some Gamble

Having others know something about you by the blogs that you post is a bit disconcerting. Well, I guess I will let the universe decide the benefit or detriment of this way. If I wanted to hide in my cave for awhile, I guess I would stop blogging. I am not that smart. I suppose that I have stuff to say. I will play with the cards that I am dealt. Call, Fold, or Raise. I’ll Give it some action and I want to see the flop. Win Big or Go Home. Knew this might happen. Knowing something may happen and learning that it has happened is certainly different.

Hopefully, It Will Take

Last few weeks, I learned a some people knew my recent religious experiences, inklings, and feelings. I never told them. They were people close. They knew of my unspoken hopes to make things right with my past. They knew of my posting. These are very personal. Its private. Yes, it is hypocritical that I write about it. Yeah, I am not so smart at times. Guess, I knew this might happen. Just didn’t think my fear was this big. Lucky for me I jumped before thinking about it too much. Probably would have my Doubt gremlins get the better of me.  Being open, so open, is not something I am very comfortable with. Yet, guess by being so exposed that I am learning to have a bit thicker skin. I am learning to have my voice be heard. Learning to live with a more open heart. I’m learning to be courageous. I’m learning to act heroic. Hopefully, it will take.

Thunder and Lightning Strikes Fear

Feels like the lesson of lightning from the movies Mongol.  All Mongols had a deep rooted fear of lightning. All, except, Termujin. As a child, Termujin was punished for being the son of the poisoned khan. As punishment, he was banished to the mountains, exposed to the booming thunder and lightning strikes. This was a most extreme punishment for any Mongol, yet severe for a young boy. Having no place to run. No place to hide. Termujin had to face the thunder and lightning as a child. Later, this experience would strengthen his resolve to become who he was meant to be. Having nowhere to run and nowhere to hide, young Termujin had to stand there and face his fears. Later, this resolve would strengthen his people. They fought an army of warriors larger, stronger, and better than they. Yet, when the storms came, the lightning struck, the thunders shook, Termujin's army pushed forward, while his enemies cowered. He became his people’s unifier. Termjuin become his people’s Great Khan. He would become the historical figure Genghis Khan. Mongol movie

I’m not saying I want to become good old Genghis. It is just being so open, so exposed. I have nowhere to hide. I must live with thoughts, my feelings, my actions, my inactions, my everything.

With all this out there, people can learn so much me. Some things I am proud. Some, not so much. People can learn just about everything I have said and done. With this fact, it is very scary. Yet, with all this social networking, easy access, and immediacy of one’s action, I have learned that no one is really an island. We are all connected. We are all open. Everyone knows something about us. If they don’t, they can easily find out.  Google yourself. It’s unnerving. 

Videotape, Front Page, Internet--Your Business Is Out There

Yet, it’s all very liberating. It’s a call for people to be accountable and ideally to be more accountable to each other.  One ethics class question I was asked comes to mind. If what you did were broadcasted on CNN, would you do it? If your thoughts were on put on the front of the Valley Press or LA Times, would you be ashamed of it? Well, I think now is the age of reality TV, social-networking, and voyeuristic society, I don’t think one can really avoid it. Tiger Wood's Personal Business

Carrion Do The Same Thing

Knowing all this, one does what he does, thinks what one thinks, and lives as one does. No shame. No apologies. No nothing. Just a person is what one is? Guess, this why abhor shows like TMZ. Piranha paparazzi living on the gaffes and misfortunes of others. Their purpose is to make their bones humiliating, degrading, stalking, ridiculing, and harming the celebratti.  Not really creating stuff, it’s just a place where people tear down and hurt people knowingly. Maybe they are bringing things to light. Maybe they provide some purpose. Carrion do the same thing. Guess, I just don’t like the tearing down much.  If one were to video tape and scrutinize everything you said and didn’t say—did and did not do—think and did not think—I would be gun shy from the glitterati and paparazzi.

Well, my time is up. My writing is much. Go out. Live life authentic.  Live fearlessly. Conquer your gremlins. Live Right. Do Right. Act Right. In time, It will Take. As my mentor might say, “Fake It ‘til You Make It.”

Defense of the Big Smile

(Borrowed from the internet. Several sites have this)
Does evil exist?

The university professor challenged his students with this question. Did God create everything that exists? A student bravely replied, "Yes, he did!"

"God created everything? The teacher asked.

"Yes sir", the student replied.

The professor answered, "If God created everything, then God created evil since evil exists, and according to the principal that our works define who we are then God is evil". The student became quiet before such an answer. The professor was quite pleased with himself and boasted to the students that he had proven once more that the Christian faith was a myth.

Another student raised his hand and said, "Can I ask you a question professor?"

"Of course", replied the professor.

The student stood up and asked, "Professor, does cold exist?"

"What kind of question is this? Of course it exists. Have you never been cold?" The students snickered at the young man's question.

The young man replied, "In fact sir, cold does not exist. According to the laws of physics, what we consider cold is in reality the absence of heat. Every body or object is susceptible to study when it has or transmits energy, and heat is what makes a body or matter have or transmit energy. Absolute zero (-460 degrees F) is the total absence of heat; all matter becomes inert and incapable of reaction at that temperature. Cold does not exist. We have created this word to describe how we feel if we have no heat."

The student continued, "Professor, does darkness exist?"

The professor responded, "Of course it does."

The student replied, "Once again you are wrong sir, darkness does not exist either. Darkness is in reality the absence of light. Light we can study, but not darkness. In fact we can use Newton's prism to break white light into many colors and study the various wavelengths of each color. You cannot measure darkness. A simple ray of light can break into a world of darkness and illuminate it. How can you know how dark a certain space is? You measure the amount of light present. Isn't this correct? Darkness is a term used by man to describe what happens when there is no light present."

Finally the young man asked the professor, "Sir, does evil exist?"

Now uncertain, the professor responded, "Of course as I have already said. We see it every day. It is in the daily example of man's inhumanity to man. It is in the multitude of crime and violence everywhere in the world. These manifestations are nothing else but evil."

To this the student replied, "Evil does not exist sir, or at least it does not exist unto itself. Evil is simply the absence of God. It is just like darkness and cold, a word that man has created to describe the absence of God. God did not create evil. Evil is not like faith, or love that exist just as does light and heat. Evil is the result of what happens when man does not have God's love present in his heart. It's like the cold that comes when there is no heat or the darkness that comes when there is no light."

The professor sat down.

The young man's name — Albert Einstein.